{"product_id":"wreck-the-tree-blame-the-puppy-candle-funny-christmas-cat-candle","title":"Wreck the Tree \u0026 Blame the Puppy Candle | Funny Christmas Cat Candle","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"93\" data-end=\"174\"\u003e“Wreck the tree.\u003cbr data-start=\"136\" data-end=\"139\"\u003eBlame the puppy.\u003cbr data-start=\"155\" data-end=\"158\"\u003eFA LA LA LA LA…”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"176\" data-end=\"222\"\u003eA holiday strategy. Time-tested. Cat-approved.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"224\" data-end=\"403\"\u003eThis candle captures the true spirit of the season: chaos, denial, and absolutely zero accountability. The tree didn’t stand a chance, and somehow… it’s still not the cat’s fault.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"405\" data-end=\"463\"\u003eLight it and let the festivities begin. Carefully. Or not.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"465\" data-end=\"490\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"465\" data-end=\"488\"\u003eWhy You’ll Love It:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"491\" data-end=\"738\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"e6nbgw\" data-start=\"491\" data-end=\"544\"\u003e100% natural soy wax blend for a clean, cozy burn\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1brni4y\" data-start=\"545\" data-end=\"599\"\u003e50–60 hour burn time to survive peak holiday chaos\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1ix2vu\" data-start=\"600\" data-end=\"642\"\u003eCotton wick for a smooth, steady flame\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"10jhxf8\" data-start=\"643\" data-end=\"688\"\u003eFestive design with elite-level cat logic\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"15hcl79\" data-start=\"689\" data-end=\"738\"\u003eNine scent options to match your holiday mood\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"740\" data-end=\"907\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"740\" data-end=\"786\"\u003eLight It and Accept What’s About to Happen\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"786\" data-end=\"789\"\u003ePerfect for decorating, gifting, or mentally preparing for ornaments to mysteriously relocate themselves to the floor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"909\" data-end=\"977\"\u003eBecause it’s not a real Christmas until something gets knocked over.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"979\" data-end=\"1002\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"979\" data-end=\"1000\"\u003eProduct Features:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1003\" data-end=\"1184\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"5hotlz\" data-start=\"1003\" data-end=\"1033\"\u003e100% natural soy wax blend\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"m36m3r\" data-start=\"1034\" data-end=\"1054\"\u003e100% cotton wick\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1l87913\" data-start=\"1055\" data-end=\"1072\"\u003e9oz glass jar\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1rs2kpy\" data-start=\"1073\" data-end=\"1097\"\u003e50–60 hour burn time\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1yahnl4\" data-start=\"1098\" data-end=\"1133\"\u003eGlossy permanent adhesive label\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1dto3zk\" data-start=\"1134\" data-end=\"1159\"\u003eASTM safety compliant\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"4dfvvb\" data-start=\"1160\" data-end=\"1184\"\u003eAssembled in the USA\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1186\" data-end=\"1197\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1186\" data-end=\"1195\"\u003eSize:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1198\" data-end=\"1235\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"m2v4af\" data-start=\"1198\" data-end=\"1215\"\u003eHeight: 3.50\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1g42fs3\" data-start=\"1216\" data-end=\"1235\"\u003eDiameter: 2.80\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1237\" data-end=\"1261\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1237\" data-end=\"1259\"\u003eCare Instructions:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1262\" data-end=\"1342\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"qdetnr\" data-start=\"1262\" data-end=\"1283\"\u003eBurn within sight\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1dq9nbs\" data-start=\"1284\" data-end=\"1342\"\u003eKeep away from children, pets, and flammable materials\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1344\" data-end=\"1544\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1344\" data-end=\"1383\"\u003eProduction \u0026amp; Shipping Notice (POD):\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1383\" data-end=\"1386\"\u003eThis product is made to order. It may take a little longer to arrive, but it helps reduce overproduction and waste. Festive. Intentional. Not the cat’s fault.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"EpiAl's Shop","offers":[{"title":"Clean Cotton \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505625303,"sku":"26366128894348564812","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sea Salt + Orchid \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505658071,"sku":"22164179064141583718","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White Sage + Lavender \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505690839,"sku":"20416888902011187493","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Apple Harvest \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505723607,"sku":"19535556989259950689","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cinnamon Vanilla \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505756375,"sku":"10507033574934112770","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Atlantis Whisper \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505789143,"sku":"18148052721442598899","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Christmas Warmth \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505821911,"sku":"29515725259125769431","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coconut Cream + Cardamom \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505854679,"sku":"20606065398684905512","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Peppered Passionfruit \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505887447,"sku":"20373650959984098173","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Unscented \/ 9oz","offer_id":48679505920215,"sku":"28993553883941240972","price":22.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"url":"https:\/\/swiftcove-3.myshopify.com\/products\/wreck-the-tree-blame-the-puppy-candle-funny-christmas-cat-candle","provider":"Swiftcove","version":"1.0","type":"link"}