{"product_id":"department-of-tremendous-success-doormat-best-household-everybody-knows-faux-seal-welcome-mat","title":"Department of Tremendous Success Doormat – Best Household, Everybody Knows – Faux Seal Welcome Mat","description":"\u003cp data-end=\"355\" data-start=\"232\"\u003eWelcome to the household that clearly has it together. Or at least says it does very confidently.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"728\" data-start=\"357\"\u003eThis bold, faux-government seal doormat delivers a first impression with just enough wink and swagger to make guests pause, smirk, and wipe their shoes like they’ve been summoned for a briefing. Featuring a clean, engraving-style crest and unmistakable swoop-profile silhouette, it blends satire, patriot-adjacent flair, and just a touch of “we’re doing great, actually.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"951\" data-start=\"730\"\u003eBuilt from rugged coir coconut fiber, it doesn’t just talk big, it works. Mud, dust, bad decisions from outside… all handled at the door. The anti-slip backing keeps things grounded, even when the messaging is… ambitious.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1086\" data-start=\"953\"\u003ePerfect for homes that lean a little louder, laugh a little sharper, and appreciate a welcome mat that doubles as a personality test.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1091\" data-start=\"1088\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1115\" data-start=\"1093\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1113\" data-start=\"1093\"\u003eProduct Features\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1400\" data-start=\"1116\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1191\" data-start=\"1116\" data-section-id=\"1cmlvbn\"\u003eGrade-A tufted coir coconut fiber for serious dirt-scraping performance\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1250\" data-start=\"1192\" data-section-id=\"1ko9cl\"\u003eBlack vinyl anti-slip backing keeps it firmly in place\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1294\" data-start=\"1251\" data-section-id=\"bpiehl\"\u003eStandard size: 24\" × 16\" (61 × 40.6 cm)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1347\" data-start=\"1295\" data-section-id=\"11wdv49\"\u003eOutdoor-ready and durable for daily foot traffic\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1400\" data-start=\"1348\" data-section-id=\"1pe1ndu\"\u003eAssembled in the USA from globally sourced parts\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1405\" data-start=\"1402\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1417\" data-start=\"1407\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1415\" data-start=\"1407\"\u003eSize\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"TyagGW_tableContainer\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"group TyagGW_tableWrapper flex flex-col-reverse w-fit\" tabindex=\"-1\"\u003e\n\u003ctable data-end=\"1523\" data-start=\"1419\" class=\"w-fit min-w-(--thread-content-width)\"\u003e\n\u003cthead data-end=\"1443\" data-start=\"1419\"\u003e\n\u003ctr data-end=\"1443\" data-start=\"1419\"\u003e\n\u003cth data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1433\" data-start=\"1419\" class=\"\"\u003eMeasurement\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1443\" data-start=\"1433\" class=\"\"\u003eInches\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody data-end=\"1523\" data-start=\"1466\"\u003e\n\u003ctr data-end=\"1483\" data-start=\"1466\"\u003e\n\u003ctd data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1474\" data-start=\"1466\"\u003eWidth\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1483\" data-start=\"1474\"\u003e24.02\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr data-end=\"1502\" data-start=\"1484\"\u003e\n\u003ctd data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1493\" data-start=\"1484\"\u003eHeight\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1502\" data-start=\"1493\"\u003e15.98\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr data-end=\"1523\" data-start=\"1503\"\u003e\n\u003ctd data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1515\" data-start=\"1503\"\u003eThickness\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-col-size=\"sm\" data-end=\"1523\" data-start=\"1515\"\u003e0.59\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1528\" data-start=\"1525\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1553\" data-start=\"1530\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1551\" data-start=\"1530\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1760\" data-start=\"1554\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1624\" data-start=\"1554\" data-section-id=\"1yg82z\"\u003eBest placed in a covered outdoor area (awning, porch, or entryway)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1682\" data-start=\"1625\" data-section-id=\"3dkslu\"\u003eAvoid prolonged direct sunlight or excessive moisture\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1760\" data-start=\"1683\" data-section-id=\"49ef4o\"\u003eExpect light shedding at first, just shake it out like a press conference\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"EpiAl's Shop","offers":[{"title":"24\" x 16\"","offer_id":48680047640791,"sku":"17228349564345296295","price":49.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"url":"https:\/\/swiftcove-3.myshopify.com\/products\/department-of-tremendous-success-doormat-best-household-everybody-knows-faux-seal-welcome-mat","provider":"Swiftcove","version":"1.0","type":"link"}