{"product_id":"cutting-board-for-cutting-things-glass-board-sliceus-maximus-edition","title":"“Cutting Board for Cutting Things” Glass Board — Sliceus Maximus Edition","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"80\" data-end=\"112\"\u003eFinally… clarity in the kitchen.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"114\" data-end=\"416\"\u003eThis cutting board does not leave room for interpretation. Front and center, a bold, mock-official seal declares its purpose with unwavering authority: \u003cem data-start=\"266\" data-end=\"303\"\u003e“Cutting Board for Cutting Things.”\u003c\/em\u003e Complete with a majestic eagle chef, crossed kitchen tools, and the proudly unnecessary motto \u003cem data-start=\"398\" data-end=\"416\"\u003eSliceus Maximus.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"418\" data-end=\"472\"\u003eIt’s official.\u003cbr data-start=\"432\" data-end=\"435\"\u003eIt’s excessive.\u003cbr data-start=\"450\" data-end=\"453\"\u003eIt’s exactly right.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"474\" data-end=\"694\"\u003eSet against a radiant yellow backdrop, this board brings a bright, almost ceremonial energy to your countertop. Equal parts kitchen tool and visual punchline, it turns everyday prep into something that feels… documented.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"696\" data-end=\"837\"\u003eSlice vegetables? Approved.\u003cbr data-start=\"723\" data-end=\"726\"\u003ePrep sandwiches? Authorized.\u003cbr data-start=\"754\" data-end=\"757\"\u003eServe snacks like a highly decorated culinary professional? Strongly encouraged.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"839\" data-end=\"1063\"\u003eMade from durable tempered glass, it offers a clean, sanitary surface with a subtle texture to keep things steady while you work. Rubber feet hold it firmly in place, because even the most official operations need stability.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1065\" data-end=\"1156\"\u003eBecause if you’re going to cut things…\u003cbr data-start=\"1103\" data-end=\"1106\"\u003eyou might as well do it under proper jurisdiction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1158\" data-end=\"1161\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1163\" data-end=\"1451\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1163\" data-end=\"1183\"\u003eProduct Features\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1183\" data-end=\"1186\"\u003e• Tempered glass surface for clean, sanitary food preparation\u003cbr data-start=\"1247\" data-end=\"1250\"\u003e• Lightly textured surface for improved cutting stability\u003cbr data-start=\"1307\" data-end=\"1310\"\u003e• Vibrant, scratch-resistant printed design\u003cbr data-start=\"1353\" data-end=\"1356\"\u003e• Four rubber feet for secure, non-slip use\u003cbr data-start=\"1399\" data-end=\"1402\"\u003e• Available in two sizes: 8\" × 11\" or 11\" × 15\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1453\" data-end=\"1456\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1458\" data-end=\"1749\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1458\" data-end=\"1480\"\u003eWhy You’ll Love It\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1480\" data-end=\"1483\"\u003e• A perfectly ridiculous design that still gets the job done\u003cbr data-start=\"1543\" data-end=\"1546\"\u003e• Bright, eye-catching look for countertops or serving\u003cbr data-start=\"1600\" data-end=\"1603\"\u003e• Durable and easy to clean\u003cbr data-start=\"1630\" data-end=\"1633\"\u003e• A conversation starter disguised as a kitchen tool\u003cbr data-start=\"1685\" data-end=\"1688\"\u003e• Ideal gift for cooks who appreciate humor with their prep\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1751\" data-end=\"1754\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1756\" data-end=\"1781\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1756\" data-end=\"1779\"\u003eSize Guide (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"TyagGW_tableContainer\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"group TyagGW_tableWrapper flex flex-col-reverse w-fit\" tabindex=\"-1\"\u003e\n\u003ctable data-start=\"1783\" data-end=\"1921\" class=\"w-fit min-w-(--thread-content-width)\"\u003e\n\u003cthead data-start=\"1783\" data-end=\"1816\"\u003e\n\u003ctr data-start=\"1783\" data-end=\"1816\"\u003e\n\u003cth data-start=\"1783\" data-end=\"1790\" data-col-size=\"sm\" class=\"\"\u003eSize\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth data-start=\"1790\" data-end=\"1798\" data-col-size=\"sm\" class=\"\"\u003eWidth\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth data-start=\"1798\" data-end=\"1807\" data-col-size=\"sm\" class=\"\"\u003eHeight\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth data-start=\"1807\" data-end=\"1816\" data-col-size=\"sm\" class=\"\"\u003eDepth\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody data-start=\"1850\" data-end=\"1921\"\u003e\n\u003ctr data-start=\"1850\" data-end=\"1884\"\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1850\" data-end=\"1861\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e8\" × 11\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1861\" data-end=\"1868\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e8.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1868\" data-end=\"1876\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e11.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1876\" data-end=\"1884\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e0.24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr data-start=\"1885\" data-end=\"1921\"\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1885\" data-end=\"1897\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e11\" × 15\"\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1897\" data-end=\"1905\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e11.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1905\" data-end=\"1913\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e15.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd data-start=\"1913\" data-end=\"1921\" data-col-size=\"sm\"\u003e0.31\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1923\" data-end=\"1926\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1928\" data-end=\"2070\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1928\" data-end=\"1949\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1949\" data-end=\"1952\"\u003e• Use regular dish soap for cleaning\u003cbr data-start=\"1988\" data-end=\"1991\"\u003e• Wipe down with a damp cloth\u003cbr data-start=\"2020\" data-end=\"2023\"\u003e• Hand washing recommended to preserve finish\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2072\" data-end=\"2075\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2077\" data-end=\"2254\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2077\" data-end=\"2115\"\u003eProduction \u0026amp; Shipping (POD Notice)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"2115\" data-end=\"2118\"\u003eThis item is made to order through our print-on-demand partners. Please allow up to approximately 2 weeks for production and shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2256\" data-end=\"2396\"\u003eTo provide faster delivery, your order may be fulfilled by one of our trusted international partners while maintaining consistent quality.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2398\" data-end=\"2500\" data-is-last-node=\"\" data-is-only-node=\"\"\u003eMade on demand to reduce overproduction… because even official business should be responsibly handled.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"EpiAl's Shop","offers":[{"title":"8\" x 11\" \/ Rectangle","offer_id":48680012284119,"sku":"28497604799711581557","price":35.55,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"11\" x 15\" \/ Rectangle","offer_id":48680012316887,"sku":"24349545454547060098","price":42.75,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"url":"https:\/\/swiftcove-3.myshopify.com\/products\/cutting-board-for-cutting-things-glass-board-sliceus-maximus-edition","provider":"Swiftcove","version":"1.0","type":"link"}