{"product_id":"catsplaining-the-year-2026-funny-cat-calendar-epileptical","title":"Catsplaining the Year – 2026 Funny Cat Calendar | EpilepticAL","description":"\u003ch3 data-start=\"1129\" data-end=\"1172\"\u003e🗓️ \u003cstrong data-start=\"1137\" data-end=\"1172\"\u003eMonth-by-Month “Catsplanations”\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1174\" data-end=\"1214\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1174\" data-end=\"1212\"\u003eJanuary – “New Year, New Excuses.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"1215\" data-end=\"1349\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1217\" data-end=\"1349\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"1217\" data-end=\"1286\"\u003eResolution: be less destructive. Reality: the blinds had it coming.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1351\" data-end=\"1354\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1356\" data-end=\"1404\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1356\" data-end=\"1402\"\u003eFebruary – “Love Language: Inconvenience.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"1405\" data-end=\"1540\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1407\" data-end=\"1540\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"1407\" data-end=\"1474\"\u003eNothing says affection like sitting on your laptop mid-Zoom call.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1542\" data-end=\"1545\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1547\" data-end=\"1592\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1547\" data-end=\"1590\"\u003eMarch – “Spring Cleaning? Bold of You.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"1593\" data-end=\"1712\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1595\" data-end=\"1712\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"1595\" data-end=\"1649\"\u003ePlease remove my fur from the couch again. I insist.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1714\" data-end=\"1717\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1719\" data-end=\"1762\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1719\" data-end=\"1760\"\u003eApril – “Accountability Is Optional.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"1763\" data-end=\"1872\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1765\" data-end=\"1872\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"1765\" data-end=\"1811\"\u003eYou say ‘accident.’ I say ‘statement piece.’\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1874\" data-end=\"1877\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1879\" data-end=\"1917\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1879\" data-end=\"1915\"\u003eMay – “Boundaries Are for Dogs.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"1918\" data-end=\"2052\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1920\" data-end=\"2052\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"1920\" data-end=\"1979\"\u003eIf I can reach it, it’s mine. If I can’t, I’ll still try.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2054\" data-end=\"2057\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2059\" data-end=\"2092\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2059\" data-end=\"2090\"\u003eJune – “Resting Purr Face.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2093\" data-end=\"2199\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2095\" data-end=\"2199\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"2095\" data-end=\"2137\"\u003eSmiling is for the emotionally unstable.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2201\" data-end=\"2204\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2206\" data-end=\"2245\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2206\" data-end=\"2243\"\u003eJuly – “Independent Since Birth.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2246\" data-end=\"2387\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2248\" data-end=\"2387\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"2248\" data-end=\"2310\"\u003eDon’t tell me what to do. Or do. I’ll ignore you either way.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2389\" data-end=\"2392\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2394\" data-end=\"2444\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2394\" data-end=\"2442\"\u003eAugust – “Productivity? Never Heard of Her.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2445\" data-end=\"2559\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2447\" data-end=\"2559\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"2447\" data-end=\"2495\"\u003eIf lying down were a sport, I’d be undefeated.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2561\" data-end=\"2564\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2566\" data-end=\"2621\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2566\" data-end=\"2619\"\u003eSeptember – “School of Hard Knocks (Off Tables).”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2622\" data-end=\"2738\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2624\" data-end=\"2738\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"2624\" data-end=\"2656\"\u003eGravity is a social construct.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2740\" data-end=\"2743\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2745\" data-end=\"2780\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2745\" data-end=\"2778\"\u003eOctober – “Witchy by Nature.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2781\" data-end=\"2906\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2783\" data-end=\"2906\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"2783\" data-end=\"2839\"\u003eEvery broom is my ride. Every full moon, my spotlight.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2908\" data-end=\"2911\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2913\" data-end=\"2948\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2913\" data-end=\"2946\"\u003eNovember – “Thankful for Me.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2949\" data-end=\"3072\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2951\" data-end=\"3072\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"2951\" data-end=\"3004\"\u003eYou’re welcome for my presence at the dinner table.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3074\" data-end=\"3077\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3079\" data-end=\"3120\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3079\" data-end=\"3118\"\u003eDecember – “The Tree Is Temporary.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"3121\" data-end=\"3249\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3123\" data-end=\"3249\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"3123\" data-end=\"3172\"\u003eJoy to the world. Destruction to the ornaments.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3251\" data-end=\"3254\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"3450\" data-end=\"3472\"\u003e🎁 \u003cstrong data-start=\"3457\" data-end=\"3472\"\u003ePerfect For\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"3473\" data-end=\"3616\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3473\" data-end=\"3509\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3475\" data-end=\"3509\"\u003eCat lovers with a sense of humor\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3510\" data-end=\"3534\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3512\" data-end=\"3534\"\u003ePeople owned by cats\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3535\" data-end=\"3570\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3537\" data-end=\"3570\"\u003eOffice, home, or gift calendars\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3571\" data-end=\"3616\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3573\" data-end=\"3616\"\u003eAnyone who secretly agrees cats are right\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3618\" data-end=\"3621\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"3623\" data-end=\"3650\"\u003e🧾 \u003cstrong data-start=\"3630\" data-end=\"3650\"\u003eProduct Features\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"3651\" data-end=\"3947\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3651\" data-end=\"3723\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3653\" data-end=\"3723\"\u003e12-month wall calendar featuring original AI-assisted feline artwork\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3724\" data-end=\"3780\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3726\" data-end=\"3780\"\u003eHanging hole and wire coil binding for easy flipping\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3781\" data-end=\"3840\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3783\" data-end=\"3840\"\u003ePrinted on thick 270 gsm paper with a semi-gloss finish\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3841\" data-end=\"3898\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3843\" data-end=\"3898\"\u003eEco-friendly: recyclable when binding wire is removed\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3899\" data-end=\"3947\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3901\" data-end=\"3947\"\u003eDimensions: 10.8\" × 8.4\" (27.4 cm × 21.3 cm)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e10.8\" x 8.4\"\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e10.79\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHeight (Closed), in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e8.39\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eHeight (Open), in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.93\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eDepth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e0.16\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"EpiAl's Shop","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":48679812759767,"sku":"22059930762039037653","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"url":"https:\/\/swiftcove-3.myshopify.com\/products\/catsplaining-the-year-2026-funny-cat-calendar-epileptical","provider":"Swiftcove","version":"1.0","type":"link"}